


An Incident Occurred at the Wedding

by minusxero



Category: DCU
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-09
Updated: 2015-02-09
Packaged: 2018-03-11 07:17:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3318812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minusxero/pseuds/minusxero
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Writing Prompt: A group of thugs try to rob the marriage between a high profile superhero and super villain (both in their civilian identity).</p>
            </blockquote>





	An Incident Occurred at the Wedding

"Alright, you little shits! It's a stick-up!"

Gasps filled the chapel. At least one scream was heard before being silenced by a gunshot.

"We don't wanna add another murder to our racket, so let's do this nice and easy. Purses, wallets, and valuables in the aisle." An uneasy silence overtook the crowd.

"NOW!"

The group of men in hockey masks paced row by row, grabbing all manner of money and jewels. Aside from some general murmuring, not much was being said. Then a laugh from the front of the aisle.

"Hey, Mr. Lucky. What the fuck is so funny?"

The groom stood there, hands to his hips, looking like he owned the place.

"You have NO idea what you've done, do you?"

"Oh, I have an idea, dipshit. I'm robbing your wedding. May I kiss the bride?" The other thugs howled with laughter. The groom did not look so amused. His eyes narrowed with intent. He turned his head a modicum to the side.

"Clark?"

Bright red lasers emerged from the eyes of the best man, superheating one of the thugs' guns. With a yelp, the gun was on the floor. As the other 6 criminals turned, the calm robbery transformed into an awesome display of efficient violence.

Three small black boomerang-like objects sailed through the air with blazing speed, hitting the backmost robbers in their respective firing arms. As they dropped their weapons, the three looked up to see a tuxedo-ed man standing among them, emenating a palpable feeling of darkness and rage. With three swift movements, the thugs were on the ground, unconscious.

The remaining wakeful four started running for the door. A blur, black and white with a red tie, found its way to the doors of the church, arms crossed with a smirk on his face. "Nuh-uh-uh, kiddos. You can't just crash a wedding and leave before the reception!" In an implausibly unified pow, all four were on the ground.

It was over in maybe 10 seconds, if you were a slow counter. The groom, barely phased by the events, made his way up to the supposed leader of the gang of thugs. There was a glint in his eye.

"Nobody steals from me. Nobody crashes MY wedding and gets away with it." He gave the thug a knowing wink. "You WILL get what you deserve."

The groom raised his arm and made a fist. A moment of hesitation. His hand unclenched. "Clark, get these pitiful creatures to the station. Justice will be served."

With a blur, the seven thugs were bound.

"You're getting better, old friend. She really has changed you for the better." The best man grabbed the attempted-robbers and flew out the door.

"Well, now that that's settled, can I get married now?" The crowd chuckled.

A few minutes later, groom and bride stood in front of the priest.

"May I have the rings please?"

The ring bearer brought the ornate boxes to the priest, who gave them to the bride and groom.

"Do you, Lex Luthor, take Kara Zor-El, as your lawfully wedded wife?"

The groom's side of the chapel slowly stood up, as the groom opened the lead-lined box to a flash of green light.

"I do."


End file.
